AO: Paragon

When: 03/26/2024


Number of Pax: 12

Pax Names: Bagger, Drumstick, Garfield, Grey Poupon, LBC, Lexi, Ma Bell, Panhandle, Primrose, Tebow, Tinder, Wax-on,

Number of FNGS: 0

FNG Names:

QIC: Ma Bell, Tinder

WARMUP: Cars still pulling up… I’ll see you in hell, let’s run!
Line up and guess what food Garf had last night
Partner warm ups with silk gloves and enemas
THE THANG: I guess there was something….Run up the hill, run harder and shut up! Stop at the light post in the distance, not that one, the other light post
Merkins and let’s go! Run more and do american hammers – 30. Run to the dump, do 11s with star jumps and more push-ups as apparently now we are calling them. Embrace the wall and jump over it. Primrose is shorter than most, but has everyone else beat on his wall jump form. Suck it.
Manning is out in the woods eating peanut brittle and rubbing lotion while watching us.
Guess what, let’s run again! Find the rocks. Only two dammit. Get into teams…Indian run while passing the rock however you feel like passing the rock. First guy passes it back…or runs it to the back…or throws it like an idiot into the grass.
Prim cannot run through grass, only the road, don’t confuse him.
Big Boy sit ups -25 6.5 count
Running!!! Let’s go to Dunkin, and stop and do stupid burpees. Run again and do monkey humpers until Primrose and Bagger make a baby with their twerking. Slight nod to the customer inside and run again to the bank.
Lexi has shady dealings with this bank, so we keep it PG and do flutter kicks while the spirit of duke and goose hump Garf’s biceps and quads. Which caused him to fart again and kill someone…never saw them again.
Run even further and do something dumb I don’t remember by Avery. Could be the ecstasy Panstan slipped me.
Run again and LBC decides to burn everyone like a jerk. Circle up and do some ridiculously hard merkin thing Drummy had us do.
Prim with the golden finish up the stairs and lunges/squats. Screwed everything about that up by bernie sandering up the hill until time.
Drummy leaves before having to rip Ma Bell a new one…I mean…exhort…him a new one??

MARY: none jerks
ANNOUNCEMENTS: csaup stuff
COT: Prayers – Tebow’s sister and GP’s daughter

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