WARMUP: Ruck with Exercises

THE THANG:
QIC: Professor Oxbow, PhD (Piled higher and Deeper)

Date: 5/29

Excused Absentees:

Hopper – Out with “back issues,” though rumors of waffle-based therapy remain unconfirmed

Leaky – Respectfully excused to support a Trooper VQ at Happy Jack when the regular Happy Jackers were too “happy” in their fartsacks to show. #HighImpactMan

The Thang:
The gloom was crisp, the wallets were tight, and the PAX came ready to enroll in “Ruckonomics 101: A Fiscal Beatdown.” Tuition was non-refundable and pain was compounded—interestingly.

Class opened with a warm-up that felt more like a FAFSA submission. Then we dove headfirst into educational debt:

Cap Gun made some questionable investment decisions, mostly involving over-striding on the hills.

Slum Lord tried to collect late fees but found himself bankrupt in burpee form.

Super Dave considered refinancing his knees halfway through.

Mattress King reenacted a full scholarship stunt by surviving the manmakers with only minor emotional trauma.

Le Pew somehow managed to sweat cologne while lecturing on the French exchange rate.

Fire Marshal Bill cited several code violations related to ruck form but couldn’t stop himself from overachieving every rep.

Final Notes:
Total miles: Just enough to question your spending habits

Tuition paid in sweat

No degrees awarded, but everyone graduated with honors in grit

MARY: Some Exercises

ANNOUNCEMENTS: Safari push for a June can drive. BAHBABAB

COT: “What are you investing in today that’ll pay dividends tomorrow? (Also, check your form—your future self has to live with that posture.)”

Prayers for Slum Lord and his Family, Praise for Le Pew. Help all PAX focus on Blessing others with what He has blessed us with.