DATE: 09/27/2018

WHERE: The Paragon

THE PAX: Swisher, Molson, Cuban(Respect), Garfield, AC, Wiggum, Preacher(Respect), Tebow, Harding, MatchStick.

Total # of PAX: 10

QIC: MatchStick

INTRO:

Late in the night, previous to the beatdown, YHC sent out an APB the Pax of the Paragon Twittersphere to solicit assistance to a possible no show by YHC due to one of my 2.0s being sick. I woke up in the morning to find Manning and Garfield willing to step up and lead the pax of Paragon in a beatdown if I needed them too. Thanks guys for being willing to lead last minute, thankfully I was still able to Q this morning.

Somehow, I’m not sure, I ended up getting out of the house super early and arriving at the AO at about 4:50.  So in the bright light of the new parking lot lights, YHC used this time to read some scripture and then walk around the football area.  I wasn’t sure if the football area would be unlocked, but it was, and it will provide many new opportunities to the men of the gloom to feel the pain that “hurts so good.”

WARM-O-RAMA:

Because the football area was unlocked, we started our mosey through the ticket gates and down the concrete stairs of the stadium, we then turned around and went back up, stepping on the seat of the bleachers.  We went back down and back up 3 or 4 times.  There was some mumble chatter asking if this was the mosey or the workout, but you know how much YHC loves to climb stairs.  I think y’all are sensing a pattern here.

We then circled up at the top of the bleacher for some 21s, an entertaining warm up that consists of 21 two count SSHs in which counts 1-5 are counted, in cadence, out loud and 6-21 are all counted mentally. If anyone stops early or goes over, we start over.  Needless to say we started over a couple of times, one time being my fault, and we all got a little bit of a laugh out of it.

OYO flying sun gods

And my latest favorite workout, Iron Hulks.  This also got some mumble chatter asking if this was still warm up or the actual exercise.

Mosey back to the hill of pain.

THE THANG:

Searching the exicon I found a great workout routine called Lazy Dora. But since I really wanted to use the hill of horror, I added to the Lazy Dora. Thus the Not So Lazy Dora was born. Partner up!

Partners perform 100 merkins, 200 LBCs and 300 squats as a team. Here’s the catch…no running. P1 starts with 10 merkins while P2 planks, then switch. Continue switching between merkins and planks until 100 total merkins reached. Next, while P1 does 20 LBCs, P2 performs a 6” leg hold until P1 is finished, then switch. Continue switching until all 200 LBCs are completed. Finally P1 does 25 squats while P2 does the air chair then switch until 300 squats are completed.

The problem with this was that I did not like that fact that we didn’t have to run. Therefore I made a rule that if either partner needed to take a break,  both partners had to go up the hill. You could either run up forwards, run up backwards, or bear crawl up, but you had to do a different one each time.  I didn’t foresee in this group of High Impact Men that no one would be the first to concede that they needed a break! Nobody was going up the hill!  I had to audible at this point and make mandatory times for the Pax to go up the hill. Finally we all finished with a little bit of time left and since nobody went up the hill as much as I would have liked, we all went back up the hill three more times. Once forward, once backwards and once bearcrawl.

We has 5 more minutes to finish out with some delightful Mary, since we hadn’t  done enough LBCs yet.

 

CIRCLE OF TRUST:

Wiggum was our 6th man today. Wiggum is 36 years old and started out at Paragon on an 8 degree day. Swisher and the Mole EH’d him.  Wiggum works for Wells Fargo as a fraud investigator and used to be a cop. He also, may have chased a naked orange cat through the quad at Berry College one time, but I’ll let Garfield answer to those charges. Glad to have you Wiggum!

Molson was informed he will be VQing on the 4th so everyone check that out!

Huge prayer request Pax and prayer warriors.  Cuban leaves on Wednesday for Kenya with a group from Serv International(check them out).  He will be gone for 12 days serving over 50,000 meals in the slums of Nairobi, caring for kids in an orphanage, and building a home and caring for a widow who is trying to take care of her kids on her own. James 1:27 says, “Religion that is pure and undefined before God the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself untainted from the world.” Thanks Cuban for exemplifying what it means to live the life!

Naked-Man Moleskin:

On a side note from today, we need people stepping up to Q and especially VQ! In order to help out with that, let’s concentrate on intentionally adding some Mary into our beatdowns so that people can get used to leading workouts and calling cadence. Once you get used to being in the spotlight and calling cadence, the rest is easy. Step up and lead men.