DATE: 11/28/2018

WHERE: The Clinic

THE PAX: Uncorked, Gut Check, Spock, Lexi, Odd Job, Harding, Tiny Tat, Good Hands, Mandals, Manning

Total # of PAX: 10

Number of FNGs: 0

QIC: Manning

INTRO:

After not logging onto Slack for most of the day, I was a little shocked to see about 2,000 messages – most about setting up a nasty December Burpee Challenge (Burcember? Decempee? Burpember?) and an even nastier 24 hour Blue Ridge Adventure Race. Combine that with the existing 4th Quarter Challenge that nobody has any clue about, The December Ruck Challenge, the amazing and incredibly well-defined and explained #goodeatschallenge, and you have a bunch of guys who have the dumb black dog look on their face.

Bottom line, is that y’all are fired up to push each other. And bottom line #2 – Babyface literally cannot say no to a challenge. 

Soooo, I’ve gotten to the point in my illustrious F3 career where I prefer to plan the beatdown on the drive over. Would I recommend this approach? Yes, I would. This morning, it started to marinate in my mind as I passed The Dumpster Fire, came a little more into focus as I was making the turn to go past The Vineyard, and finalized as I breezed past the turn to The Chatterbox. 

Thankfully Hank Hill provided me with directions (aren’t midwesterners nice?) and I made it to The Clinic and was greeted by Lexi, Harding, and Gut Check. Others very quietly, and very politely arrived and we all made some nice small talk, and then we were on our way.  

WARM-O-RAMA:

I called out “let’s modey” which was immediately noticed by some snarky pax. Oh great, my mouth is freezing up again – ala “the incident” at the Turkey Bowl. If this was your disability, Garfield would laugh at you. True story.

OCD ALERT!!!! Whomever installed that Christmas tree in the “center” of that gazebo should be sent off to the same place that we sent Babyface to correct his Kodiak off-centered behavioral problems. Let’s just pretend that it doesn’t bother us. But. We. Can’t. Stop. Staring. At. It…ugh

Did some Cotton Pickers and nobody made fun of me. What alternate universe am I in?

Did 10 Burpees and set the table for what was to come…only 91 more…(yes I like to write with ellipsis…)

THE THANG:

Modey in an indian run over to Chatt Tech where I tried to make a joke about the last time I Q’d the pax over here and we did 11’s. (silent stares, groan). Ok, ok, we’re going to do a Bropee River Dance (up the river and back down). 10 at the top, then 9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1. Uncorked turned his back on us and slowly started walking away. He reminds me of the guy in Seinfeld that runs into the woods and digs a hole to sit in when he gets stressed out. But not today, my new friend. We’re here for ya bro. We got in 3 BONUS BURPEES picking up the 6. Only 46 more to go…

Indian Run over to the Pure parking lot. Several incidents along the way. Sheer panic about some tiny overhanging crepe myrtle branches, followed by Harding trying to ditch us (nope, not today), followed by Gut Check faking a calf injury (also nope).

Stay with your Bro, and line up for a C4 inspired “6-slingshot” where we partner-ran and “slung” one man way out ahead where he had to knock out 10 burpees before being caught by his partner. Do this until you each complete 30 Burpees. Only 6 more to go…

Light jog back to the amphitheater stopping at each crosswalk for 1 burpee. 101 burpees = complete. But wait, there’s more! With about 7 minutes left, we entered the stage for some balls to the wall. With stories of men who crumpled down to an untimely demise, and some good swollen lip banter, we stayed on the wall (you need me on that wall!!!) for what seemed like an hour. I looked over and saw Mandals literally reading a book and responding to emails. Ok, I’ll drop out to save you from embarrassment…

Still 3 minutes left for MARY where we did American Hammers, Froggy curls (lol), Dying Cockroaches, and Merkins. Back to the flag, and we’re done. GREAT WORK BOYS!!!

CIRCLE OF TRUST:

Prayers for the Creekview HS boys involved in yesterday’s terrible accident, their families, and the tragic loss of life.

Gut Check asking for prayer for some work-related anxiety (thanks to Uncorked for sharing those verses – perfect)

Harding mentioned doing a Christmas party/dance lesson on 12/22. More to follow

Giving thanks to be able to be out in the gloom with our brothers and friends. To become stronger and to be there for one another – always.

Naked-Man Moleskin: